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 October 2010
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Sunday 24th of October 2010 and I left Ek-Star behind on jetty 510 in Skarvikshamnen in  Go:teborg. Well, actually, she was leaving when I left. When I reached the road there was no sign of my taxi.
I was killing time taking pictures wishing for the taxi to be here real soon. It was  cold and I was starting to freeze. Darn, it will be nice to leave the winter behind.
It's only October and they have already have snow in Go:teborg, must be some  kind of record.
My taxi arrived when Ek-Star was leaving the jetty and I asked the driver to wait for a minutes so I could get a picture of Ek-Star when she was steaming down Götaälv on her way to the anchorage. Then it was nice to get in to the car.   so it was just to get the key at the arrival to the hotel. And I had not been in my room for long before I got yet another picture from their stupid party. And obviously someone had been puking at their party. Interesting.
My friend was on Bohusmalmön in the North of Bohuslän and I expect them back in the evening. I went for a pizza at 2 o'clock and it was darn cold outside. Luckily enough it was just a 30 seconds walk to the restaurant and they were looking strangely at me when I came in dressed for summer. Well, I will be back in FUNKY TOWN in just a few days and I will leave the winter behind. But I read in Bangkok Post that Thailand is under water. 
Flooded by rain and the flood is approaching Bangkok. So we will see if I can take a taxi back home from the airport, maybe I have to take a boat.  I can't help wonder if it is God's punishment for allowing child porn to be sold openly on the  streets.
When I tell people about this in Sweden about the child porn they don't believe me. They are just gaping  thinking that I'm lying to them.
- No, I'm not lying. But it's f@cking unbelievable. - If you sell child porn on the streets of Sweden you would wish the Police came to arrest you before you would have been beaten to death by angry people. I don't know, maybe there is a different way of thinking about it when you're Asian. But I don't think so. Or maybe I'm over reacting, but they spend millions in Europe to fight child porn and here they are selling it openly on the streets. But I had to make sure I wasn't over reacting so I spent a few days in the workshop building my latest invention, the “Christmas Dinner NO NO” meter®. A machine measuring the appropriateness of different topics of conservation. A meter going from 0 to 10. from 5 and up the scale changing colour from orange to red. Time to test the machine. - I did time for selling contraband gold and jewellery - No response, not even the smallest vibration - I did time for contraband cigarettes - No response, not even the smallest vibration. Now I got worried that my design was a failure. - I did time for contraband booze - WOW, the needle jumped up to 1, perhaps a strong 2  depending on the people around the table. But still in the clear.
- I did time for selling doping drugs - Now we're reaching the orange area, a NO NO around the Christmas dinner table. - I did time for selling drugs - Motherf@cker! The needle hit 10 before I even finished my test sentence. - I did time for selling child porn - My “Christmas Dinner NO NO” meter® jumped off the table trying to stab me. I made one final test. - I did time for selling terror flip-flops and I had to redesign my “Christmas Dinner NO NO” meter®. This was obviously beyond belief. 
My friend had borrowed my friend's car so he could go play ice hockey. So I  called a taxi and I went to pick up my friend and his wife  on my way to YAMMY Kitchen.
They were waiting for me outside my friend's apartment and we could take off to YAMMY kitchen without any delays. 
It took us about 10 minutes to get to YAMMY kitchen and I took the time to take a picture of the place even though it   was freezing cold outside.
After taking the picture I stormed inside in hope to meet Miss “Most beautiful in the world”. We took our seats and the waitress approached us. She was beautiful, but I was not 100% sure it was the same waitress as last time. Maybe her sister? She told me that she knew my SPECIAL sushi when I ordered.  Maybe it was her. I had to ask her if she was the waitress last time we were at YAMMY.
- Yes! - Were you the beautiful waitress or the NOT so beautiful waitress. She looked puzzled  and I don't think she understand what I meant. Well, she gave me extra seaweed and a jar with sesame seeds and I wrapped my sushi in the extra seaweed. The waitress was looking at me.
- So this is how you want your sushi? - Yes, do you work tomorrow so you can explain for the Cook how to do it?  - You are well known here so no problem
 - What the  ?!! How do you know me?
- You always wear colours. - OK, so tomorrow I want sushi ALADDIN STYLE! We spent almost 3 hours at the place and our friend came to pick us up with the car. They dropped me at the car and I will call to wake them up at 8 o'clock tomorrow morning and we will have breakfast at my hotel before we take off to Skåne. We have planned for a stop at laxbutiken for lunch on our way to Båstad in Skåne.  - It means yummy. - But that spells with a U not a, I said. - No - Well, I'm pretty sure it spells with a U, I said. Never mind, the food is excellent and the service is very good so we don't care how they spell the name or what it means. I will most likely be back tomorrow. +++++++++++++++
Monday 25th of October 2010 and I was half dead  when my alarm went off at 8 o'clock. I called my friends to make sure they got out of bed.
- OK, see you at 09:30! I had a shower and I relaxed in front of the TV news. I had expected my friends to be delayed so I was surprised when my friend called me at 09:30. - Where are you? We're waiting for you in the restaurant.   our way to Skåne.
And it was cold when we came outside. Even though it is  only October we have  had sub zero temperatures and my friend's car had been covered with ice when he got out this morning. And there were still ice on the car when we left my hotel.
First stop was to leave some flowers at my friend's mother. While he was inside with the flowers we walked his dog so we didn't have any accidents  in the car on our trip to Skåne.
   And we also discover that my friend don't want me to take his picture when he is using the “POO BAG” to pick up the dog droppings.
But the worst was that he was hiding the doggy poo under a traffic cone on our friend's mother’s parking place. Well, someone is in for a surprise when lifting the cone.
OK, when my friend returned from his mother we could finally take off towards Skåne and I was really looking forward to the stop at Laxbutiken. 
We were cruising down the motorway and as I had no diet drinks in the car I asked my friend to stop at a petrol station. I bought two diet drinks and my friend bought coffee and pastries. I was just looking at them, we are just some 30 minutes away from Laxbutiken and they are stuffing themselves.
We continued and it was a beautiful trip and I enjoyed myself up in the front seat. Diet drinks, good friends and a gorgeous day, but no good music. We need good music. I searched my friend's car and suddenly I found an  old cassette tape. SKARA SOMMARLAND II, my old tape and this tape must be 15 years old. I turned on the tape and suddenly we had good music blasting high in the car. That was a difference and a good day turned in to a perfect day
We approached Laxbutiken and I could not believe my eyes when my friend just passed the exit from the highway. - What the Bozo!! We were supposed to take off her!
- Are we going to eat again? - Motherf@cker! My friend in the back and I screamed. A stop at laxbutiken had been the plan all the time so we had to turn around and go back.      the highway and go back on the country road. OK, it was not bad, we got to see the Swedish country side. And our friend the driver was pissin' and moanin' all the way.
- I don't understand why we are going to eat again. - Hey, the stop at Laxbutiken was planned since a few days back. - I'm not hungry. - Of course, eating cookies and chocolate all day long. You should have done it like me, don't eat! We arrived and we went in to Laxbutiken, well, the old entrance and now Laxbutiken had turned in to something else. - What the is this?
Then we discovered a new house next door with a big sing saying Laxbutiken so we went there and it was a new improved Laxbutiken. We entered the place and we were in the middle of the self service section. Just as the old place, but much fresher. But we're not going to a restaurant for self service so we asked the girl where the REAL restaurant was. She showed us the place and we got three menus. We ordered a salmon pastry as a starter and raw spiced salmon with potatoes in dill sauce. And of course, chocolate as dessert. And I had been drinking tea and my friend was drinking soft drinks.  Well, he has his thing going when he is at a restaurant. Always leaving a tenth of a meatball to show the waitress that he is full and then he goes next door to buy a kilo of chocolate.
  - We will soon pass the border to Skåne and I need a nice picture of the sign. I kept my eyes open for the sign and the only problem was that we had the sun in our faces so when we finally reached the border it was hard to see the sign. I had to take the picture by chance and luckily enough I managed to get the picture. But it wasn't all that good, would have been perfect if we have had the sun in our back.  We were looking at my old house before continuing to look for the bank. We found the bank at the very same place it was 20 years ago when I was at the bank last time. We passed and we drove down to the marina to check it out before we returned to the bank.
   and hardly no people to be seen on the streets. Almost like a ghost town.
I stepped in to the bank and they were looking at me. Who is this guy coming here? And wearing shorts in the middle of the winter! I got my cards while my friend was walking the dog. Our driver went to buy marzipan and I bought a few diet drinks. We were ready in Båstad so what to do now? Return to Go:teborg.
 - YEAH!! Let's eat where we had the Christmas dinner last time in Mölle, my friend suggested.  And I was not surprised to hear that our driver got upset.
 - Are you going to eat again! I'm full!
- Of course you are, you just had a kilo of chocolate bars and a MAGNUM bottle of juice. Strange, but he is never hungry when we're talking restaurants. But in the car, he has no bottom.  - Hmm, maybe because he feels comfortable in our company.
I don't know, but maybe it is something psychic that a Shrink can help him with. Never mind his eating disturbances, we took off towards Mölle. We skipped the highway and we drove the old road that we had to use back in the days when I was a child before there was any highway. And it paid off, we passed the flag of Skåne in Förslöv a few kilometres from Båstad. - STOP! I NEED A PICTURE! We came a wee bit too far, but we didn't bother going back because of the cars behind us. But I got the flag of Skåne and that was the important. And when checking out the picture I discovered that I had been lucky with my picture. Well, at least a little lucky. When we approached Mölle my friends started to pester me about my first job I had. And I got fired. I was 12 or 13 and I came to the job on a Wednesday. On Friday afternoon when the farmer handed out our salary he told me that I didn't need to come back on Monday. well, working at a farm was nothing for me.  And I never understand why I had bothered to mention me getting fired for my friends. They never let me forget this.
I told them that we were going to pass the farm on the way to Mölle.  - YES! SHOW US!! WE MUST SEE THE FARM!
    And in Mölle we had to made the compulsory visit to Kullen's fyr on Kullaberg.   all the way to Kullen's fyr. (Kullen's lighthouse) But now there is a parking lot 500 meters from the lighthouse.
Not a distance I want to walk in shorts in this weather and luckily enough our driver didn't understood the signs saying NO ENTRY with cars so we could drive all the way to the light house. We got out of the car and it was very windy and cold so I took a few quick pictures and I returned to the car.  
  - The restaurant is only open during weekends on the winter.  - We only have hamburgers and a Shrimp sandwich. - OK, we take the shrimp sandwich. 2 sodas and 1 pot of tea.
 I took a picture of Mölle marina from Hotel Kullaberg and there had been some changes since I lived here. When I lived here there was a kiosk selling smoked fish and a sign with “FRESH SHRIMPS FOR SALE” Well, it was more like “FRESH DEEP FROZEN SHRIMPS FOR SALE” and I had a friend that borrowed my moped back when I was 15. He was drunk and drove down to the marina. Parked my moped outside the kiosk chasing away all the customers screaming: - The shrimps are not fresh! They are deep frozen!  - Who was the guy on your moped?  - I have no clue Nepal
It was very nice to leave Mölle behind and we were in a hurry. We needed to be in Halmstad before 5 to my oil to my friend's car. And we stepped on it and we made it just in time. Mölle Halmstad in just over 30 minutes. More diet drinks and we took off back home to Go:teborg where we were going to change the oil and to go look for a computer for my friend. I had called my friend in Bangkok and he asked if I wanted to join him for India. - India?? No way!. But what about trekking in Nepal? - Not a bad idea, he said. So if I go I need a camera and I can look at a camera when my friend is looking for a computer.  
??!! The car stopped at 1000 rpm so we had to keep the engine running at 1000 - 1500 rpm  at all the time. When we came to Go:teborg the car stopped again and we decided to bring home the car and take a taxi from my friend's place.
It was a drama to get the car to my friend's place. It stopped several times and we had a queue of cars behind us honking at us. - Over take us Motherf@ckers! When we arrived to my friend's place we called a taxi and he took his dog to his apartment while I and our other friend went to the supermarket.  Darn it was cold! And where the hell is the taxi? I had to wait in the supermarket, it was  so cold outside and the taxi took 30 minutes to come and they had told us 10 minutes.
We had called TAXI Kurir and after 30 minutes a BANDIT taxi passed. He made a U turn coming back asking for our name. - I'm ordered for a guy called Iskerut - No I'm Aladdin and we called TAXI Kurir. - Ah, then it's me! - About time! We entered the taxi and we were at YAMMY kitchen 10 minutes later. And what a disappointment, we discovered that Ms. “Most  beautiful in the world #1” was -1.gif) not working today. DARN!
Well, let's see if Ms. “Most beautiful in the world #1” had managed to instruct the Cook on how I wanted my sushi yesterday. I told the waitress that the waitress from yesterday had explained for the Cook on how to make the ALADDIN SPECIAL sushi. - The Cook from yesterday is off today! - What the
Luckily enough my friend had a picture of me eating my sushi yesterday. He brought out his  phone and showed the waitress the picture.
She dashed off to the kitchen and she gave the instructions to the Chef and when I got my sushi they were the best I had been served at YAMMY  kitchen so far.
8 of the sushis. Yes, I started with 4 and I placed a new  order for 4 just to show my appreciation.
Then we had Yakiyoki or whatever they call it and we finished our dinner with deep fried ice cream. 2 pots of tea and I was ready to return to my hotel. I need sleep, it will be a long day tomorrow again. Take my friend's car to the garage, take of the mast from their sailboat, eat sushi at YAMMY and get to the airport. In a taxi or in my friend's car? +++++++++++++++
Tuesday 26th of October 2010 and my alarm went off at 8 o'clock. I called my friend and he will  be at the hotel for breakfast at 09:30. I called our other friend “The driver” but he had turned off his phone. Of course, time to take off the mast from the sail boat. So sleeping was preferred.
And, yet again my friend surprised me by being in time for the breakfast. He called me at 09:30.  - Where are you?
 - I'm in my room, I come down.
When I came down my friend was already eating. Waffles, whipped cream and strawberry jam. Well, plenty calories but I don't know if there was very much vitamins in his breakfast. It was a gorgeous morning so it was a perfect day to take off the mast from my friend's sailboat. We called the “Late Riser” and surprisingly enough he was out of bed. But he still needed some time for breakfast so we had to kill time until he was ready. So we decided to go buy some Swedish DVDs when we were ready.   the DVDs, a few good Swedish DVD van come in handy in handy as hangover DVDs this very upcoming  weekend. I found 10 DVDs and my friend bought a few DVDs as well and we were ready to go pick up our friend.
The sailboat business was cancelled and we returned to my hotel and I packed my bag and checked out while my friends took care of their cars. When I was ready I checked out and I took a taxi to my friend's apartment. We will go have dinner at YAMMY kitchen before they drive me to the airport. Our previous Cook from Ek-River will join us and she told me that she had a Christmas gift,  exciting!  Hopefully Ms. “Most beautiful in the  world #1” will work today.
When I arrived to my friend they were busy playing TV games. My friend's wife was busy serving cookies, coffee and tea and I took the opportunity to update my web page while my friends  were playing TV games. The finished at 2 thirty and our friend left to join his ship. I packed my computer  and we were pretty much ready to leave for YAMMY kitchen where we should meet the previous Cook at 15:30.
We arrived to YAMMY and there was a sign OPEN 16:00 on the door. I never felt on the door, but I was disappointed. Well, our  previous Cook while we were on the street.  Now we had to find another restaurant. There were some people coming and they entered YAMMY so we went after them. I discovered that the sign said OPEN 16:00 on Sundays and today its Tuesday.
We took our seat and I got the gift and it was a pleasant surprise. Our previous Cook had knitted  a pair of socks for me. And as she said:
I made them in all your favourite colours. - For you to use on the flight - Are you crazy? I don't want to destroy the socks by walking around on a dirty airplane. At first I told her that I would do it the Asian way. - I will open the gift when I'm coming home so you won't see if I get disappointed. - But this is for you to use on your flight. - OK, I open it. But no disappointment, a pair of home knotted socks in beautiful colours is always nice to have. So I was in a very good mood. Gifts and it was the beautiful waitress working. Sushi and deep fried ice cream before we left for the airport. My mood didn't improved when I was thinking about the flight. 12 hours and this is something I could have been lived without. But I have to do it and I'm rewarded handsomely with nice weather when I arrive back home.   - Not possible to upgrade the ticket.
OK, I will try to do it in Frankfurt. We killed an hour at the airport before I went through the security check and I stopped at the tax free shop on my way to gate 17. Need to buy chocolate for the children and this time I hope they are happy with the chocolate. I remember when I bought Filipino chocolate for them, they are still talking about this chocolate. - We have not finished the chocolate yet, it tastes like
Yeah, but if I buy some Toblerone we can as well buy it at Foodland. If I'm on the Philippines I buy chocolate from the Philippines. We left Go:teborg in time and I  had about 2 hours in Frankfurt before my flight to FUNKY TOWN departed. I went to Lufthansa's office.
- Sorry Sir! Biz is full, the whole flight is overbooked. - Very nice to hear! So I knew what I had to look forward to when  boarding the flight. OK, it's just 10 hours left so I will try to survive.
I was tired from having been up since 8 o'clock this very morning so I wanted to sleep. They brought us some stupid dinner and when we had been on our way for 2 hours I felt a sleep. And of course, the passengers next to me woke me up after an hour or so. - Excuse us, we need to go to the bathroom. I was back a sleep 10 minutes later. Sleep, I don't know if I want to call it sleep. It's more like I was just slumbers waking up every 5 minutes. So of course, the little time was good only for passing time. I never got any rest out of it. +++++++++++++++
Wednesday 27th of October 2010 and I woke up 2 hours before arrival. We were served  breakfast, scrambled eggs and spinach. It was not the  kind of food we're used to in business class. But it was OK.
2 hours to go and this must have been the longest 2 hours in a very long time. I spent most of the time in the galley drinking water, 5 more minutes in the seat and I would have died. Motherf@cker, it the same story every time. You sit down and you think “This was not so bad” but after 5 minutes in the darn seat I'm ready to jump overboard.
  complaining about the child porn on the street I might  have turned in to a persona non grata. Custom, no problem, 30 kg of snus.
I took an airport limo and I arrived home 30 minutes later. And I filled my fridge with the snus and I was pretty much ready with the unpacking.
Yes, it's nice when you have finished with your luggage and you can take care of more  important work. I had to dash of to the
It took me 90 minutes to get my medical certificate so I had to skip Foodland on my way home. I have a few friends coming over so I went straight   to my local 7 Eleven to buy some hangover milk and a few diet drinks.
My friends arrived 30 minutes later and we had a few drinks. Stroh Rum, my last bottles that I bought in  Frankfurt a few years ago. I had searched every tax free shop in Frankfurt on my way over here. But they don't sell it  anymore. What a shame!
- Hmm, maybe I will have to go for a skiing holiday to Austria so I can buy more Stroh Rum.
And as we can see on the pictures most of my  potted plants are dead. So I will have to buy new ones when I'm coming back from Manila. Well, it's the same story every time, when I'm coming home I have to get a truck load of potted plants.
We ended up at TAPAS and I remember that we went to GLOW, but there were no people so we left the place after just a few seconds. +++++++++++++++
Thursday 28th of October 2010 and I didn't leave my apartment. Well, I went to my travel agent to pay my ticket to Manila and I went back home again.
  - Yo! 8 o'clock!
- OK, thanks.
We were going to meet at the place where they make the  driving license at 9 o'clock to renew our driving licences.
My friend have a VISA so he got 5 years and I only got one year because I don't have any visa. I tried to bribe the girls behind the counter with Mentos, but in vain. And as I only had a 1 year VISA I had to do all the tests again. They sent me to room #16 for colour and reaction test. I had expected it to take 10 minutes to renew my driving license.
 I took a taxi back home.
I had a few hours with my HTML editor before my friend  arrived. We were going to eat dinner and we were going to meet my Teacher at the Japanese restaurant on Soi 19.
Would be very nice with some salmon and  avocado sushi, and that's even though the waitress is nothing compared to Ms. “Most beautiful in the  world #1” at YAMMY kitchen in Go:teborg.
We meet outside the Japanese restaurant at 5 o'clock and we entered the place just to discover that they didn't open until 17:30. - Where to go? 
Our Teacher suggested a Korean restaurant and we walked to the restaurant on Soi 12 and we ordered BBQ. My friend is a vegetarian so he ate salad only. 
He had a meeting at a vegetarian restaurant at 7 so I went there to see him when I and my Teacher were ready at the Korean restaurant. More beers at Govindas together with some  avocado and we left for Robin Hood at 9 o'clock. I had 2 or 3 beers at Robin Hood before I left for my apartment to fill up my  pockets with snus. I made a quick stop at GLOW for a Captain Morgan before I continued to FUNKY VILLA at Thong Lo.
I have people coming over tomorrow at 12 o'clock to make lunch so I should have gone back home to get some sleep when FUNKY VILLA closed. But no, I continued to another disco on Thong Lo. There are 3 or 4 places that are open to 6 or 8 o'clock in the morning. +++++++++++++++
Saturday 30th of October 2010 and I was not exactly full of vim when it knocked on my door at 12  o'clock. Felt like I just had gone to bed, and most likely I had just got to bed, coming home from Thong Lo in day light.
My Teacher and her children were the next ones to   arrive and now we were waiting for my other Teacher, her husband and their new child. Her husband was the one to make the cooking. And as a good service they made the food both spicy and not spicy so I could eat as  well. Otherwise Thai food can be a bit spicy and I  really don't enjoy the burning feeling of eating spicy food.
It was excellent food and our Cook had made 3 different soups, spicy, medium spicy and not spicy. I only tried the not spicy food. Our French friends arrived around 3 o'clock. They thought it was dinner and I understand them. Going up at 12 o'clock on a Saturday morning seems to be a wee bit too much.  Especially after a Friday night on town.
When we finished the meal, by the time the food was ready it was more like a dinner than lunch, we moved to my balcony. It was very nice to sit outside and the temperature was perfect. Like a nice Swedish summer.    bed 20 minutes before  1 o'clock. So it was just to try to sleep again.
Yes, I blame it on the jet lag, the STROH Rum and the fact that I never got any sleep between Friday and Saturday. Well, not very much sleep. A  few hours tops. Next time we make it dinner and not lunch so we can have a few hours of extra sleep.
But this was the first time we were sitting on  my balcony, otherwise it's way too hot. But this should be the coldest winter in 1000 years so this might be the reason.
Well, sleeping instead of going to the disco and I saved myself some money. +++++++++++++++
Sunday 31st of October 2010 and I didn't left my apartments until 5 o'clock. I went to buy some remote controlled boats for my nephews so we can have a boat race in their fish pond next weekend. I stopped at the Japanese restaurant on soi 19 on my way back home. Salmon and avocado sushi and a bottle of water and I was soon back home with my remote controlled boats.
And I'm ready to leave for Manila tomorrow.
    
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E ni Svenskar och inte förstår Engelska så ska ni skämmas. J och Björn, med det menar jag inte att alla mina stavfel ska ältas varje gång vi träffas.
Well, the flag of Skåne, just a BONUS flag.
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